Grieving
by Jenn11
Summary: In each chapter an Avenger has died, and the Team grieves for them. Nothing graphic. Only this first chapter actually has the death in the story. Thor is first. Chap 2 - Clint. Chap 3 - Nat. Chap 4 - Tony. Chap 5 - Bruce. Chap 6 - Steve. Chap 7 - Pepper
1. Chapter 1

Title: Grieving

A/N: I'm going to do a chapter for each Avenger. I have the others in progress, some almost completely, others still need work. I just thought it would be interesting to explore how they'd show (or hide) their grief, and deal with it.

Oh, for this fic, Loki has somehow redeemed himself and is free and part of the Asgard royal family again.

THOR

Thor was been fighting Thanos, but collapsed to the ground, blood pouring from him. Clint, not surprisingly, was the first to see it.

"THOR!" Clint yelled. That drew everyone's attention. Hulk, almost negligently, smashed away the Chirauri nearest him, then leapt towards his fallen friend. He considered all the Avengers friends, Metal Man being his favorite. Tony landed beside Thor seconds ahead of Hulk. Hulk roared at Thanos and reached for him, but Thanos used magic to disappear just as Hulk would have caught him. He'd learned from what Hulk had done to Loki in their first battle.

Steve arrived next, with Clint and Natasha right behind him. With another roar, Hulk turned back to the fight with the Chitauri – smashing things being the only way he knew to deal with the anger and pain he felt. Hulk was not used to emotional pain - that was the Little Doctor's job. Hulk dealt with physical pain and the Little Doctor dealt with emotional pain.

Iron Man let loose with his arsenal, as Natasha sent out a hail of bullets. Clint got back to his high perch, and loosed arrows at lightening speed.

As word that their Prince had fallen spread among the warriors of Asgard they fought even more fiercely, and the Chitauri were driven away.

AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS

The Avengers approached Frigga and Odin. "We're very sorry for your loss," Natasha spoke the formal words. She kept her face a composed mask, but her eyes showed her pain and grief.

"He was a great warrior. The greatest I've ever met… and an even better friend," Clint said. His sunglasses hid his eyes, as full of grief and pain as Tasha's.

Clint, Natasha, and Steve, had been training even harder than usual, in preparation to go after the one who had murdered Thor.

"I'm so very sorry. Midgard mourns with you," Bruce said, careful to use their word for Earth. The Hulk had raged for hours after Thor's loss, and had come out several more times in the days since. It showed on Bruce's haggard face.

"Did Thor tell you the name of our Team?" Steve asked.

"The Avengers," Odin replied.

"And we will Avenger Thor," Steve promised, stoic. His red eyes the only indication of the tears he'd cried.

"You think to beat Thanos and the Chitauri, when all of Asgard could not?" Odin asked.

It was Tony who answered, "Before…" Imaged of Afghanistan flashed in his mind. "Before I became Iron Man, I was called The Merchant of Death. I designed and built weapons our world had never seen. With Loki's help, I've designed something he and I both think will take down Thanos." The dark circles under his eyes, so dark it looked like bruises, attested to his sleepless nights working in his labs with Loki. Bruce, when not the Hulk, had also helped. "It's not built yet, but will be within the week."

"Thanos will pay for killing Thor," Steve promised. The other all gave nods of agreement.

Loki led his parents off to the side. "They truly did mourn," he told them. "Stark has pushed beyond what I thought were human limits of intellect and body, working with me to design this weapon. Natasha cried, and I have never seen her cry – not the genuine tears she cried for Thor. Nor have I ever seen the Hulk rage so fiercely. It is less obvious with Clint and Steve, but they have also grieved deeply for my brother."

Neither replied, they just looked over at the grief stricken Avengers.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Here is Clint's chapter. Nat's will be up on Friday. Thanks to everyone who added this story to your Alerts or Favorites lists. Special thanks to Sakurayuuki19 for the review.

CLINT

It had been stormy for days, evidence of Thor's grief, but the day of Clint's funeral dawned sunny and clear.

Clint had been in the military before his recruitment to SHIELD, and was being given a military burial with full honors. When the soldier handed Natasha the folded flag that had covered Clint's coffin, she held it to her. No one could see her eyes behind her dark sunglasses.

Thor thought back to the night Clint had died. He'd found Natasha out at Clint's favorite place on the roof. He'd wrapped his great red cape around her shoulders. The falling rain hid the tears they cried. He didn't speak, but stood out in the storm with her, giving silent support, and rain to hide her tears.

When they finally went inside Pepper was waiting with towels and blankets. Once they'd dried off a bit, and had blankets around their shoulders, Pepper led them to the main room where the others were gathered. The fire was going, and Bruce handed them hot chocolate. They spent the night telling their favorite stories involving Clint.

The media, of course, wanted to ask Natasha questions about Clint's death, and their rumored relationship. Pepper, used to dealing with the media for Tony and Stark Industries, dealt with them. With her usual cool professionalism, she made it very clear that Black Widow was to be left alone; and that the full weight of Stark Industries, and the Avengers, was behind her. Privately, Pepper made sure that there was plenty of ice cream, chocolate, and any other comfort food available to Tasha in the Tower.

Steve sparred with Natasha, so she had a way to take out her grief and anger; which also let him take out his grief and anger. Bruce sat silently beside her on the roof when she couldn't sleep, telling her without words that she wasn't alone, and wasn't the only one grieving. On these nights, his eyes turned green, but neither mentioned it. The next several fights Hulk was present, he looked to the high places, as if he couldn't truly believe his Hawk was gone. Natasha quit SHIELD, but stayed an Avenger. SHIELD and Clint were too entwined in her mind. She could use her work with the Avengers to continue trying to get the red out of her ledger.

Tony set up the Clint Barton Memorial Archery Contest, to be held yearly on Clint's birthday. The funds raised went to help children who were victims of domestic violence, along with extremely generous donations from Tony. He always used his personal accounts, not Stark Industries accounts, for the donations.


	3. Chapter 3

NATASHA

Clint hadn't eaten in the two days since Natasha had died. He just stayed in her room. As Pepper was about to take him yet another meal, that she knew he wouldn't eat, Bruce stepped close. "Let me, Pepper. Please."

She nodded, and tried to smile, but couldn't. She was still grieving as well. She'd made it her personal mission to take as much care of Clint as he'd let her, knowing it is what Natasha would have wanted. It was the only way she had to honor her friend.

Bruce didn't bother to knock, just opened the door with one hand as he balanced the tray of food in the other. As usual, Clint didn't respond; he just kept watching the sunset out the window. "If you don't eat this, I'll have you sedated and use an IV to get nourishment in you," Bruce informed Clint in his usual soft voice, but Clint didn't miss the steel in it. Bruce set the tray down on Clint's desk.

Clint turned to face Bruce. "Bruce…"

"We need you, Clint. We just lost Tasha, we can't lose you to."

"I need her," Clint said, turning back around.

"I know that. We all know that. But, Clint… This isn't what she'd want for you… You know it isn't."

"She can't want anything for me anymore," he said softly. "And all I want is to join her."

"And people call me selfish," Tony said as he entered. "Like Bruce said, we need you. We can't lose you now. Pull it together, Clint." He paused, but when Clint didn't react, he played what he hoped was the trump card. "No one knew Tasha like you did. You die, the best memories of her die. We lose even more of her. If you can't live for yourself, how about living for her? At least keep her memory alive."

Clint slowly turned around. "You're a bastard, you know that, Tony?"

"I know," Tony said, his tone lacking its usual sarcasm.

Clint slowly walked to his desk, and sat down. He took a sip of water, then slowly began to eat.

"We miss her too, you know. Not like you do, but we miss her," Bruce said.

For the first time Clint really looked at his friends. "Bruce… your eyes…"

"They've been green since… the battle," Tony noted.

"Hulk's way of grieving for her, far as I can tell," Bruce responded. "He's close to coming out, but not pushing it. He seems satisfied with all the smashing he did…"

One side of Clint's mouth turned up in a half smile. Hulk had let Bruce out long enough to try and revive Natasha, then went on a rage like they'd never seen. Usually once the enemy retreated Hulk would let them go. This time he hadn't. Clint had stayed holding her body, but in the background he'd heard Hulk's roars and the destruction Hulk was causing.

Thor knew that Natasha had been a woman of secrets and shadows, but he told all of Asgard tales of her skill, cunning, and beauty, so that she could have the honor she deserved, and be remembered. He commissioned songs in her honor from Asgards best musicians.

Tony created and funded the Natalia Romanov Ballet Scholarship; paying for poor girls to attend ballet classes. Natasha may have never achieved her childhood dream of being a ballerina, but other little girls would. And it would be in her name – her real name.

Steve drew several pictures of Natasha, and gave one to each team member. He also drew Natasha and Clint together, and gave that to Clint.

A/N: I wanted Thor doing something besides causing a major storm to show his grief and honor a friend. Okay, this is the last of Tony using his money to honor his friends memory. It just seemed to fit for Clint and Natasha. I'm thinking Tony is next up…


	4. Chapter 4

TONY

The night Tony Stark was killed New York saw a lightening storm such as had never been seen before anywhere on Earth, or even Asgard. It centered on Stark/Avengers Tower, lasted all night, and was Thor's tribute to his fallen friend. At dawn Thor almost collapsed from exhaustion, as the effort had exhausted even him.

It had been two days since Hulk had smashed the men who'd killed his Metal Man, but still he raged. He'd fled the city, and raged in the vast Canadian wilderness. The city reminded him of Metal Man, and Metal Man would not have wanted his city smashed.

When Bruce came to himself he found a blanket thrown over him, and a set of clothes beside him. Once he'd changed, Clint came out of the woods. "Ready to go home?"

Bruce nodded. Clint touched his earpiece and called for the Quinjet.

Pepper was waiting when they walked into the Tower. She threw herself into Bruce's arms, and cried against his chest as he held her. Eventually she pulled back. "Are you…" She fell silent. He wasn't okay. He'd lost his best friend. None of them would be okay for a long time. "Are you injured? Hungry? Thirsty?"

"I'm… home. Clint made sure I ate and drank on the flight back," he reassured her. Once again he was amazed by Pepper. Even in her grief she was trying to take care of him.

None of them commented on his green eyes. Over the next days the green faded, but it took weeks to really disappear. Even then, a few green flecks remained in Bruce's eyes the rest of his life. Tony had always encouraged him to let the Other Guy out more.

Bruce quickly discovered that his lab was both a sanctuary and torture chamber. He'd get lost in his work, and forget that Tony wasn't just upstairs in his lab. Then he'd want to show Tony something, or ask Tony a question, and the realization that Tony was gone would rip the wound back open, almost as raw as the day it happened.

Steve dealt with the press, so that Pepper wouldn't have to. When cameras were off he made it very clear to the reporters that Pepper was to be allowed her privacy as she grieved. Natasha had become Pepper's shadow, and after a couple run ins with Natasha's angry glare, and broken cameras, even the paparazzi gave Pepper her space.

Since Natasha knew nothing had been more important to Tony than Pepper's welfare, Natasha thought the best way to honor him, what he'd want and appreciate most, was to care for and watch over Pepper.

Pepper buried herself in work, as her way of dealing. She took to sleeping in Tony's tee shirts, as it made her feel closer to him. She relocated to Malibu, as she felt closest to him there.

Clint missed Tony most on missions. They'd developed a habit of bantering back and forth during missions, and the silence was painful. A reminder that Tony was gone. More than once he'd caught himself in the middle of calling out a target, or just making a smart alec remark, to Tony – who was no longer there to take out the target or respond with a snarky or sarcastic remark of his own.

Steve never quite got over the guilt. Tony had saved him, gotten him out of the ice, but he hadn't been able to save Tony.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Realized I missed this last chapter. My apologies. Thank you to those who added this story to our Favorites and Alerts lists. Special thanks to discordchick, ReginaRose, Hollyleaf6, CluelessItalian, and DeepFried Chicken for your wonderful and kind reviews. Thank you!

BRUCE

Tony buried himself in his lab. He only slept when he passed out from exhaustion. He ate at least some of the food Pepper brought, because she'd threatened to have him admitted to a hospital and given a feeding tube if he didn't. He knew everyone would tell him he had to accept the loss of his best friend, and go through the grieving process. He wasn't ready to do that yet. He wasn't truly in denial; he knew, felt, that Bruce was dead. He just didn't know who to deal with the pain that truth caused. Keeping busy kept the pain at an almost bearable level.

Steve lost count of how many punching bags he demolished. He drew many pictures of Hulk and Banner.

Thor returned to Asgard and told tales of the incredible Hulk. His strength and power – enough to match, or even beat, Asgarians. He also told stories of Doctor Bruce Banner - h his brilliance and gentle manner when healing people. Those were his mother's favorite stories, while the Warriors Three preferred the Hulk stories. He missed his post-battle sparring matches with the Hulk.

The day after the funeral Natasha vanished. The next day Fury showed up. "Where is your partner, Barton?" he demanded.

"I don't know, Sir."

Fury considered the answer for a moment. The duo didn't keep secrets from each other. But they were also intensely protective of each other. She might have not told Barton so he could honestly say he didn't know where she was when Fury asked. He wished, for the several thousandth time, that Phil was still around. Phil was the one only person, besides each other, who could tell when one of them was lying.

"You found her once…"

"I wanted to find her then. And she now has years more experience," Barton retorted.

"And you have years more experience," Fury pointed out.

"The only way we'll find her is when the bodies start turning up," Clint stated.

"You think she's going after the rest of the group."

"We already killed the group itself. She's going after anyone at all associated with the group that killed our friend," Clint replied.

"You're angry about that?" Steve asked, seeing the anger in Clint's eyes and hearing it on his tone.

"I'm angry she didn't take me with her," Clint told him.

Steve nodded in understanding.

"Why didn't she take you along?" Fury asked.

"It would be easier for you to track us together, than Nat by herself. But it's probably for the best anyway." Seeing there curious looks, he continued. "I'd probably just put an arrow in them. Nat gets more… creative when people make her angry. They deserve it. And she wanted me here to watch out for you guys," Clint finished, looking at his friends. "She's going to be making some dangerous people very angry, and Avengers Tower isn't exactly a secret hideout. I couldn't save Bruce, but nothing is happening to the rest of you," he vowed.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Okay, final chapter. Sorry it's so late. I kept trying different things and none of them fit. It's a bit different from the others, and not my favorite, but I hope you like it. Thanks to all who reviewed, or added this to their Favorite or Alert lists.

STEVE

Each of the Avengers spoke at Steve's funeral.

Tony: My father… My father admired and respected Steve Rogers. When Steve was lost in the ice, my father spent a lot of time and money trying to find him. When I was younger I resented him for all that. Then I found Steve in the ice. The first times we met, we were always at each other. And not just in fun. We meant it. We were aiming to wound. Then we worked together. I came to understand why my father admired and respected Steve so much. I came to admire and respect him. I was honored when I earned his respect and friendship. Today, the country mourns Captain America, their hero. I mourn Steve Rogers, my friend.

Bruce: Captain America was a hero. The first superhero. Strong, fast, and patriotic. Steve Rogers was a talented artist, honorable man, and great friend. I'm not sure anyone else could have given Hulk directions in battle. But Captain America did, and Hulk basically followed them. Few, if any, will understand what an achievement that was. What that said about the man. Tony teased Steve that Tony and I were the brains of the Avengers. We are. But Steve… Steve was the heart of the Avengers.

Natasha: I've met a lot of men in my life. Barely a handful of them do I consider to be good men. Steve was one of them. He was a good man. A good friend. A good leader. A good soldier. A good person. If more men where like him… we'd have a much better world.

Clint: The first time I met Steve, he had no reason to trust me. But he did. He trusted until you proved him directly that you shouldn't be trusted. Some would say that was a weakness. It wasn't. Not for Steve. He had a way of making you want to live up to that trust. He gave me a chance when not a lot of people would. In the military I was taught to respect the rank, even if you couldn't respect the man. I respected the man. I respected Steve Rogers. I will miss Steve Rogers. The world is a… lesser place without him.

Thor: On Asgard we value brave and noble warriors. I valued Steve Rogers. I learned a great deal from him about how to be a leader. A leader who inspired others to follow him because of who he was, rather than by force of a title or violence. A leader who wanted only the best for those he led, and his realm. As Prince of Asgard, I am used to giving orders, not following them. But I was proud to follow the orders of Steve Rogers as we fought together. He was a natural strategist and tactician, who knew where each of us could be most useful. But we weren't just pawns for him to move around in battle. We were his friends, and he never forgot that. I will never forget him.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Per Me's request, here's a chapter for Pepper. Thanks for the idea, Me. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, or added this story to their Favorites or Alerts lists.

PEPPER

"That was easy," Steve noted as they gathered after taking out the last of the attack robots.

"Too easy," Natasha added.

"A distraction," Clint put in.

"A distraction? It is common tactic, but a distraction from what?" Thor asked.

"Clint, if you wanted to hurt Tony…" Natasha began.

"I'd ignore him, or better yet get him out of the way, and go after-"

"Pepper! We were just leaving for that meeting when this pulled me away…" At the time he'd been glad to be spared the meeting, but he'd left Pepper unprotected. Happy was on vacation, so she didn't even have him. Iron Man took off to the road she'd have taken.

By the time the others arrived, Tony had the Iron Man suit off, and was holding Pepper's dead body against him, refusing to let the paramedics take her.

The grief Bruce felt, and concern for Tony, overwhelmed his anger – at least for the moment. He knew Hulk liked 'Metal Man', and wondered if Hulk understood that right now Metal Man needed him as Bruce, not Hulk. "Tony…" Bruce began. "You need to let them take her."

"No! They can't help her now!"

Half an hour later Tony finally handed her over to Bruce, who gave her to the paramedics.

They arrived at Stark/Avengers Tower and Tony, the grieving lover, disappeared into the genius Avenger. "Hawk, I need to you watch any security footage you can get your eyes on. If anyone's going to see something that will help us, it's you."

Clint nodded.

"JARVIS, get him any relevant footage you can – I don't care how."

"Already downloading it, Sir. It's on the computer in your room, Mr. Barton."

"Natasha –"

"I'm going to Stark Industries. If this ever happened… Pepper wanted me to retake my place as your assistant/her replacement; and take care of things at Stark Industries for a while. I have the paperwork for The Board. I'll handle the press as well." It went unsaid that Pepper had known Tony wouldn't have Stark Industries as a priority for a long while.

Tony nodded.

"But I'll be here when it's time to go after whoever killed my friend," she added.

"Never doubted that," Tony said, knowing how close Pepper and Natasha had become.

AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS

While their days were busy, at night Clint would hold Natasha as she cried, his own tears falling down his cheeks. Their training session became even more intense, as they used the sparring to help work out the anger they felt.

AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS

When they arrived at the enemy base, Bruce didn't even try to fight the transformation. Hulk had been unusually patient; and after killing Pepper, they deserved whatever Hulk did. It was isolated, so no real danger of Hulk hurting an innocent.

Hulk didn't wait for orders, just rushed the building. "Kill Pep! BAD!" Hulk growled at the enemy before beginning the serious smashing. He didn't leave much for the others. They were mostly on clean up, catching those who tried to flee Hulk's wrath.

Hulk knew Pep made Metal Man happy, and that Pep liked Little Doctor and Hulk. He was even angrier than usual at the ones who'd killed her. He was enjoying smashing them, and for once Little Doctor agreed with all the smashing.

AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS

It had been stormy for a few days when Steve approached Thor. "Been stormy for a while now, Thor."

"And it will be stormy for a while longer, Captain. With the death of Lady Pepper this city has lost much of its light and beauty. The city should know that," Thor answered. Before Steve could say anything else, Thor turned and left.

Tony had been walking by, and gave Thor a small, but grateful, smile as they passed. Thor took that to mean that Tony had heard the conversation, which he had, and approved of his actions, which he did.

The stormy weather continued for almost two weeks. There was only occasional rain, but the sun was never seen. The city's light had been taken from it.

Steve headed down to the gym, and destroyed several punching bags. Then he drew a large image of Tony and Pepper, both smiling and happy, which he gave to Tony. Tony thanked Steve, and hung the image in his bedroom. Steve also drew a smaller 8x10 picture of Pepper with the loving, indulgent look they'd only seen directed at Tony. That picture ended up on Tony's desk.

AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS AVENGERS

At the funeral Thor, Bruce, Steve, and Clint acted as paul bearers. Tony walked behind the casket with Natasha at his side.

Once the funeral was over, Tony retreated to his Malibu mansion to grieve. Only the Avengers and Col. Rhodes were allowed access to the mansion. He left Happy in New York to be Natasha's driver as she oversaw Stark Industries for him.


End file.
